


Transcendent

by FairythePigeon (Me_aGlorifiedPigeon)



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: By virtue of running the imagination, Gen, Headcanon, Meta, Roman is accidentally crushing on Virgil now I guess whoops, Roman is very powerful, So so much headcanon, Thomas is more of a nebulous outside force for now, godlike abilities
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:55:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23492821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Me_aGlorifiedPigeon/pseuds/FairythePigeon
Summary: Prince did not have a name, and he did not have an awareness of the greater beings beyond his knowledge. There was no Roman. Until there was.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Thomas Sanders
Comments: 4
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this instead of sleeping.

Prince is just what his title says he is: he is a prince. What that means is rather loosely defined by what the imagination's image of a prince is, but Prince does not know that. He simply exists, and he does it quite well. He's not exactly a daring hero, but he rescues princesses from most dangers. He fights villains, saves the day, spends time with other princes. He's a prince, and all that comes with it.

And then one day Prince isn't just a prince, and the imagination isn't just the world he lives in, he's... he's dreams. He's goals. He's Thomas. Or rather, he's part of Thomas, as are two faces he's seen very rarely in the imagination. Dad and Teacher stand to either side, and he stands before his creator, his own face, his own self.

And at the end of the day, Prince returns to the imagination as he always does, but rather then forget he remembers. He is Thomas, but he is not Thomas. He is Prince, but he is not Prince. But if he is not Prince, then Dad is not Dad and Teacher is not Teacher. But if they are not Prince, Dad, and Teacher, then where are Prince, Dad, and Teacher?

The question is answered flawlessly by the imagination. No one questions why there are now two Prince characters. Only Prince-Thomas-But-Not questions it. He asks Prince, "Should I be here?"

Prince looks at him, confused, and says, "Shouldn't you? Or wait. Should you?"

And it is clear in that moment that Prince-Thomas-But-Not no longer belongs here. The castle is not his, these are not his subjects, and yet they still are. He makes a house in the outskirts of the populated areas of the imagination, way out where no one has ever been able to reach, out where he could not reach until he became Thomas.

He sits there for an unknown period of time. He has begun to realize that the mind has no true passage of time. To him, decades now pass in a blink of Thomas' eye. Time is meaningless, and nobody is touched by it here unless Thomas wants them to be. Prince-Thomas-But-Not spends three weeks alone in this house before Dad-Thomas-But-Not arrives.

"Hello," Prince-Thomas-But-Not says. "Why have you come, good sir?"

Dad-Thomas-But-Not weeps, and he buries his face in his hands. "My children are not mine. They replaced me with another man in my clothes, with my face, and... and I don't belong there."

"Because you're Thomas," Prince-Thomas-But-Not guesses.

"Except I'm not," Dad-Thomas-But-Not insists. Prince-Thomas-But-Not nods.

"I know."

It's another few "weeks" before Teacher-Thomas-But-Not arrives, with a grin and papers, and his glasses slightly askew but his tie impeccably straight.

"Thomas made us. We aren't him, but he made us him. He gave me his logic- I have reason to believe I may be in charge of his left brain," Teacher-Thomas-But-Not announced.

"You mean he split himself?" Dad-Thomas-But-Not asks.

"In a way, perhaps! But I am Logic- that's who I am," says... says Logic. It makes sense. Prince-Thomas-But-Not likes it.

"Thomas made you his logical side," Dad-Thomas-But-Not thinks out loud. "Well, he made me his Moral side! Am I Morality, then?"

"Yes, yes I think so!" Logic exclaims. He looks excited. Dad- erm, Morality laughs.

"I love it! I feel better now," he says. There is still sadness in his eyes, but he seems better now. Prince-Thomas-But-Not nods.

"Then what am I? Dreams?" It does not fit quite right. Morality frowns and Logic shakes his head thoughtfully. They agree then, it does not feel right.

"Maybe we should stick with Prince," Morality says.

"Thomas has a new Prince," Prince-Thomas-But-Not protests.

"Then Princey," Morality suggests, and Prince-Thomas-But-Not... _Princey_ concedes. It feels better, in any case.

Thomas begins feeling anxious about the upcoming thanksgiving dinner. He cannot cook, and Morality goes to lecture him about such a thing. They have learned that they have a certain amount of freedom with Thomas.

It is odd. He is them, and they are him, but they can see him whenever they want. Princey believes Morality is beginning to even love him, which makes sense. He is a father with no more children. Logic seems to love him too. He cares deeply for his health and education, at least.

Princey, at the very least wants to love Thomas. That is all he knows how to do, want and pray and hope and dream. He wants to battle this anxiety of Thomas' and wrestle it into submission.

And just like that, a man appears before them. He calls himself Anxiety, and he spits out foul words and claims that Thomas isn't prepared. Princey does not like him. Especially not when he appears to Thomas. It seems he has the same freedoms as any of them, and Princey hates it.

He wanted to make an enemy out of Thomas' anxiety and the imagination provided. So he did. He fights with Anxiety, and Anxiety fights back, and he's so- so _rude_ and _vulgar_ \- he feels like Princey's pure opposite!

Still, through this, Princey learns. He is not just dreams, he is Creativity. He is ideas. He has the most control of the imagination. Morality, who discovers soon enough that he is also the heart, can make little things too, but Princey can make people. Logic can make things, but he rarely does so outside of reasoning purposes. Anxiety can make things, but he has the most trouble with it. He makes disasters. Another reason Princey despises him.

It is at dinner one day that Morality brings it up. Anxiety doesn't eat with them, but he is sulking somewhers nearby. Morality says, "I think I have a name."

"A name?" Logic asks. Morality nods.

"A name. I feel like it came with who I am. I just didn't know until now, is all," Morality says.

"What's your name?" Princey asks.

"My name is Patton," Morality says, pleased. "Isn't it a beautiful name?"

"It truly is," Logic says, awed. "I think I also have a name."

"Oh! What is it, Logic, please tell me!" Patton says. Logic smiles, an increasingly rare thing.

"Logan."

"Logan," Patton repeats. "A wonderful name!"

"Patton," Logan echoes. Patton turns to Princey and smiles.

"What's your name?" He asks, and Princey blinks, wide eyed.

"Roman," he says, and he is surprised to find that it's true. He has a name. He has never had a name. He'd never needed a name. Now he has one.

He notices Anxiety sulking in the corner and almost asks him his name. But before he can address the other side, he disappears down the hall. It's startling, realizing that they have grown so much further from what they had begun as. They are sides of Thomas now. He has given them himself and they have become more complicated than any of them thought they could be.

Roman is a prince, whatever that means for him. But that is not all he is.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman knows he made Anxiety to be his enemy. But are they really so different? And how is it that pieces of Thomas can keep secrets from one another?

Anxiety sits on the floor even when he is alone in the living room. Roman has seen it, peering down into the living room from the stairs while Anxiety is plugged into his headphones with his back to the stairs. The house is modeled after Thomas' but Roman has added a few extra rooms. It's almost like living in a dream, half familiar half unfamiliar and it connects in ways that make sense only in the imagination.

In any case, Anxiety sits on the floor. Or he perches on the back of the couch and watches the living room. Or he sits on the television stand and hisses at people who come down the stairs. Anxiety does not even once ever sit in a chair.

Roman has seen Anxiety sit in a chair once, and he sat in it... oddly. Anxiety does not sit in chairs. He does, sometimes, sprawl across the couch. But that is only late at night when he assumes no one is around.

Roman doesn't know why Anxiety doesn't like his room. He's never let anyone inside to find out. Not that Roman would want to know what that cave of despair would look like. It's just the natural curiosity of Thomas, to want to know. And isn't that odd, that they can keep secrets from one another while they are parts of the same whole?

Anxiety is an oddball, that's for sure. He's...

_**Vile** , **dangerous** , a **threat to our dreams** -_

Yes. Yes, Roman agrees. That little voice gives him validation, gives him the strength to perservere. Anxiety is a monster holding Thomas back from achieving his dreams!

He even proves it himself, when he heckles Thomas at New Years, convincing him to change his resolutions- his goals! Roman's sacred ideas for things Thomas could have attempted to change this year! Sure, some of them were just ridiculous -like he could stop singing Disney- but some were quite reasonable!

The next time Anxiety is speaking to Thomas, he refuses to let the man ruin his day again. They're arguing quite a bit, and then-

"I still _like_ them, I just think that there are some darker messages that we don't first see," Anxiety says, and Roman falters.

After the video, when all is said and done and the two of them are alone in the house at the edge of the imagination, Roman clears his throat to grab Anxiety's attention. Anxiety's eyes twitch in his direction, and his body tenses, but he seems intent on playing aloof, and he doesn't turn to face Roman.

"You surprised me today," Roman admits. He fidgets with his sash. "I thought you were my antithesis, and... I didn't expect you to like Disney too."

Anxiety turns to look at him, frowning deeply. "Just because you made me, or all of us, or whatever, doesn't mean I'm like anyone in the imagination. You made this body, but anxiety has always been a part of Thomas. And Thomas loves Disney. It wouldn't make sense if I didn't."

Roman stays silent for a long time. Then he says, "What's your name?"

"I don't have one," Anxiety says. "You made this body, but you did not make it loved enough for a name."

"That sounds cruel of me," Roman says. Anxiety shrugs. He has nothing to say about that, it seems. "I remember things from before I was Roman, you know."

"From when you were Prince?" Anxiety asks.

"From when I was Thomas," Roman contradicts. Anxiety looks at him. His curiosity has been piqued. Another thing they have in common- Thomas' curiosity. "I remember Thomas decided that parts of me were... undesirable. Unfit for the world."

"Scary," Anxiety sumises. Roman figures Anxiety would know.

"I worry, sometimes, that there are still parts of me he dislikes," Roman confesses.

Anxiety stares at him unblinking for a long while. Roman wonders if maybe they have been standing here, staring at each other, for weeks. Finally, Anxiety says, "There probably are."

Then Anxiety leaves, and Roman finds himself scrabbling for comfort.

_There probably are._

_He's **just** being anxious. He **doesn't know** what he's talking about. You're the **most important** side here._

It sounds like a hissing, and Roman for a moment imagines that the sound is coming from a snake. A golden snake that coils arpund his arm. It takes Roman a moment to realize that there actually is a snake there.

"Oh, hello," Roman coos, running his fingers over it's glittering golden scales.

"Hello," it hisses in return. Roman chuckles.

"And who are you?" He asks.

"Is it not obvious," the snake hisses, uncoiling itself and slithering onto the floor. It sits there a moment. Then it says, "I'm Thomas, but I'm not anymore."

"And what part of Thomas are you?" Roman asks, turning away as the snake begins to grow human limbs in quite a disturbing show of metamorphosis.

"I believe," the new side says, as he twists and warps into a form. "I believe that I am made of lies."

"Oh? Who are you?" Roman asks, studying the emerald scaling across the new man's face.

"Me? Call me Deceit. Excuse me, I must be going. Your sash is quite becoming, it brings out your eyes," Deceit says, as he begins to leave. Roman flushes, but he lets the new man go off.

He isn't sure what he asked for that gave him Deceit, but he doesn't see him again for a while. That's alright, because Anxiety's sudden worsening mood becomes a problem for all of them.

It's not that he's affecting Thomas more than usual. He's doing the same things as he always does. The problem is how short he is with Patton, how much he gets irritated with Logan. How likely he has suddenly become to hit Roman with a verbal blow that lands below the belt.

Anxiety is sharp. He looks like Thomas, if Thomas were paler, if Thomas were angrier, angstier. If Thomas were slouchier, and thinner, and just the taddest big more angular. Roman, Logan, and Patton all look like Thomas too.

Somehow, now that they are only half imaginary, they all look both more and less like Thomas. Roman wishes he knew what Anxiety looked like without being a piece of Thomas. How would Anxiety look if he were a separate part, a like Prince or Dad? Would he be shockingly different from how he is now, like Logan is from Teacher?

At some point while roaming the Imagination, Roman stumbles across Prince, and an Anxiety who- he smiles, and Roman ducks behind a tree to watch as they engage in... almost _fli_ _rtatious_ banter. This Anxiety is not as sharp. Or rather he is, but the Imagination turns his sharp edges to fuzz, like all the rest of the subjects of the imagination. He's alert, and rather quickly he spots Roman. He steps between Prince and Roman almost protectively, and Prince notices him then.

"Thomas!" Prince greets, and Roman is startled before he recalls that the subjects have taken to calling them all Thomas. They recognize him in them now. The Imagined Anxiety's face softens. Seems he has a soft spot for Thomas.

"Sorry," he says. "I'm not used to this, and you felt... weird."

"That would be you feeling Thomas," Prince explains distractedly. He never did care for the logistics of things, just for what he considered important. Roman supposes he's still like that too. Anxiety wrinkles his nose.

"He looks just like you," Anxiety mutters. "I don't trust it."

"Does he? I didn't notice," Prince hums, and Roman forces out a laugh.

"I was just passing through. Making sure everything was alright," Roman assures. "I'll just get out of your hair."

It's odd, somehow, that even as a shadow of himself, Anxiety can be semi-conscious that he's in a world where logic only applies when Thomas wants it to. For a moment, he wonders if that hypervigilance is stronger in Anxiety than in this pretend Anxiety. He doesn't think too hard about it.

Trying not to worry about Anxiety, however, only makes him worry further. One moment, he finds himself wondering why Anxiety couldn't have a name? He shakes the thought from his head. Anxiety doesn't have a name because he's the _enemy_. He doesn't deserve a name.

One day Anxiety is bringing Thomas down, telling him that he will never stop breaking his own resolutions, and the next he's shyly admitting that he wants Thomas to spend more time with his friends.

The most surprising thing to Roman is when Thomas asks Anxiety for a name, and rather than say he doesn't have one... he makes a joke. It's after this that Roman goes to track him down again.

"You have a name now?" Roman asks.

"I was surprised too," Anxiety says with a small smile. "It came to me during the video Thomas made. The Q&A."

Roman wonders what that could mean. "I thought you told him you didn't want to tell him because you didn't want to admit that you didn't have one, but today..."

"Like I said, I'm not about to open up to you after you spent all day _literally_ changing the person I am," Anxiety huffs. Then he shrugs. "But yeah. I guess deep down _some_ part of Thomas actually likes me. Maybe it's the undesirable creativity, huh?"

Roman just stares at him for a long time. "Maybe."

He hears the hissing of the snake in the back of his head. He tries not to focus on that.


End file.
